You guys may curious why I didn't publish any blog for few days. There are two reasons, the first one was I felt blue these days and the second one was I needed to publish something special for my 111th blog entry.


You may also curious that why I wrote this blog in English. That's because I knew that not only Thai people come to this blog. So I need you guy from all over the world read this blog entry too.


And here it is, my 111th blog, "Mr. Different".

August 20, 1984: A baby opened his eye to see this blue planet for the first time. He looked normal and was not different from any other one.


It was my family's happiness among the sadness since they just lost the nicest woman, my aunt, few months before he borned. Only thing he knew about his aunt was she was a very nice woman who loved him much. She bought so many things to prepare my coming. Unfortunate that she didn't have a chance to see his face. Although he didn't have a chance to meet her by person. But he always feel like she is beside him all the time and his heart get warm everytime he think about her.


Days passed, he grew up like normal kids but not all... when he was young, God tested him with many cruel things. His kid life became the horrible time. Although he can pass those things but he lost happiness and his memory since then and replaced by sadness and loneliness. After that, tear, sadness and many bad things happened to him changed him to the someone "special".


From those bad things merge with feeling of the one whom nobody want, they motivated him to wish all the time to be someone different. Someone that everybody want. However, it's not that easy since he was so shy and lacked confidence. So he couldn't do anything but wish, wish and wish.


After the dark period which abound with unhappiness, one day he learned that the best way to get rid of these negative feeling was to make himself happy. And the best way was to make another one happy. He changed to the fun guy since then... The first changing.


Although he wanna be the special one but he always thought that he couldn't do anything because he significantly lacked confidence. But at last, he decided to participate some competition in the field of computer even though he had no computer because of his poverty. That time, he did his best and won the 1st prize. His mind had been changed. That's the first time he thought that "I can do anything I want to, just be on a good thing". The second changing.


After that, he worked hard and got success in his role. However he was still very shy and inarticulate so he always worked as behind. But one day when he decided to seperate from team, he recognized that he was nobody... Nobody knew him. That minute, he learned that it's very important for his life to present himself. So he practiced a lot to break through his limitation. At last, he won himself and became the thing he had never thought he could, Speaker. The third changing.


24 Years passed. After the long period of hard working. The child grew up to young man. Young man that people said that he is totally different from everyone. Young man that somebody call him Talented. Young man that many people need to accompany with.


He's not only the person of family, the person of academy, the person of country but now he's the person of the world. At last he could reach the target he have ever built up, Mr.Different.


I must admit that he is greatly success. Only few guys can reach this position. Many guys envy him and wanna be him except one guy... himself.

He recognized that actually he is still the human.

The human who need love.

The human who need somebody to walk with.

The human who need to rest.

The human who can sick, can tire and can die.

People expect great things from him. Although he could do as they expected but he was not happy at all. He's proud of being him but at the same time he's so tired...


Everyday he stands in front of the mirror to see his tired face. "When will it finish? When will I get free?", these questions always launch in my head together with migraine.

If you read till now and know me enough. You may know already that "he" is me..

Yes, he is definitely me. The guy who get success but brimful with miserableness. The guy who love to make people laugh but always cry with loneliness.


Many friends asked me "why you always sad even though you get success and have a chance only few people can reach?". The answer is... I grew up by sadness. I have this day because of unhappiness. However I try my best to throw away those things out of my life since I don't need it no more. Although it's not that easy but I will be able to do it someday, I will.


Lastly, nowadays I learned that it's useless to get success in work but there is no one who love with sincerity beside. The only thing he needed for his life is to have somebody beside, encourage each other and walk pass the good days and bad days together. I found one but unfortunate that I lost her because of myself...


As you guys see, my life is not easy. If you still envy me, I suggest you to change you mind because...

It's not easy to be me.